Sharing

After a very social evening in which Mini-Me was pushed to her limits, and a car ride home full of bickering, Papa announced that he would handle bedtime with Mini-Me tonight. I fixed him a bottle, laid out the swaddling stuff the way I always do it, and left them to it. It feels very unsettling to be sharing this ritual with him, because it's always been my job. It seems childish to get hung up on claiming bedtime as my domain - sure, Mini-Me's care is my full-time job, but she is our kid, after all. In thinking about it, I realized that I feel usurped and a little fearful that I can be easily replaced in Mini-Me's life. Rationally, I know it's silly, but I just don't feel like sharing sometimes.

It's unfair to Papa - this morning, when Mini-Me woke me up before I was ready and the cat jumped all over me after spilling all my stuff off the night table and I felt put-upon by every member of this household, he listened to how I was doing and acknowledged that I'm feeling stretched too thin. Taking bedtime off my hands should be a treat, right?

I think I'll go play in the stained glass studio for a while and see if that helps.